The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie

The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie is a 2008 American computer-animated family adventure comedy film directed by Mike Nawrocki and written by Phil Vischer, produced by Big Idea Entertainment and Starz Animation. It is the second film featuring characters from the VeggieTales video series and is the spin-off to the 2002 VeggieTales film Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie, and was also the first theatrically released computer-animated film to be distributed by Universal Pictures, who would later gain ownership of the VeggieTales franchise through the 2016 acquisition of Big Idea's owner DreamWorks Animation.

Plot
Somewhere in the 17th century, after attacking and boarding one of the Kingdom of Monterria's ships, the pirate Robert the Terrible captures the Prince Alexander and sends his men in search of Princess Eloise. Eluding the pirates, Eloise and her servant Willory (Archibald Asparagus) emerge and send a device that the king made, called a "Helpseeker," to find heroes to save Alexander.

In modern times, three misfits: the "yes man" George (Pa Grape), the lazy Sedgewick (Mr. Lunt), and the timid Elliot (Larry the Cucumber) are employees at a dinner theater. Although they want to be seen as heroes by their loved ones, as lowly cabin boys they think their dream is unattainable. After wrecking the show, they are fired and thrown into the alley, where the Helpseeker locates them. Elliot activates the device, transporting them to Monterria.

Meeting Eloise and Willory, the group sets off to Jolly Joe's Tavern where they learn that Robert, the brother of the king, has kidnapped Alexander in the hopes of exacting revenge on his brother, who banished him. Setting sail in search of the whereabouts of Robert's hideout, the pirate's men capture Eloise and Willory. As George and Elliot continue on their quest, a cowardly Sedgewick decides to stay behind in a cave filled with "cheese curls", afraid to face Robert. After the two leave, however, Sedgewick discovers the curls are living worm-like creatures and is chased out of the cave, overcoming his fear and laziness along the way.

Meanwhile, George and Elliot arrive on an island populated by a rock giant family, who help them make it to Robert's fortress. Arriving at a hidden bay outside of the fortress, the trio are attacked by a giant serpent. However, Elliot realizes the guardian is actually a mechanical device and is able to shut the machine down from inside and save the two. Once inside, George, Sedgewick, and Elliot rescue the prince and princess but are confronted by Robert. Finding his self-respect, George uses a chandelier to knock the pirate down and the group escapes through the fortress's cistern with Robert in hot pursuit. Back in the bay, Robert's ship opens fire on the group's small boat, but the king arrives, sinks Robert's ship and rescues the group.

After receiving medals from the king and declared heroes, the Helpseeker returns Elliot, George, and Sedgewick to the restaurant. Unbeknownst to them, Robert has stowed away on their trip back and attacks the dinner theater set and mistakes Sir Frederick (Jimmy Gourd), one of the stage performers, for George. In a final showdown, the trio defeat Robert and send him back to his own time. The audience cheer wildly as the gang earn the respect they had desired. Offered a second chance to be in the show, the three refuse and leave to pursue adventure elsewhere as the Helpseeker blinks once again.

Cast

 * Phil Vischer - George (Pa Grape) / Sedgewick (Mr. Lunt) / Willory (Archibald Asparagus) / Sir Frederick (Jimmy Gourd) / Mr. Hibbing (Mr. Nezzer) / Pirate at Jolly Joe's (Phillipe the French Pea) / Bob the Tomato / Additional Voices
 * Mike Nawrocki - Elliot (Larry the Cucumber) / Pirate at Jolly Joe's (Jean-Claude the French Pea) / Rock Monster Dad / Additional Voices
 * Cam Clarke - Robert the Terrible / The King
 * Yuri Lowenthal - Prince Alexander
 * Laura Gerow - Princess Eloise
 * Alan Lee - Blind Man / One-Eyed Louie
 * Tim Hodge - Jolly Joe (Charlie Pincher) / King's Ship Officer
 * Megan Murphy - Jolly Joe's Wife (Madame Blueberry)
 * Cydney Trent - Bernadette (Petunia Rhubarb)
 * Keri Pisapia - Ellen
 * Sondra Morton Chaffin - Caroline
 * Drake Lyle - George Jr. / Rock Monster Boy
 * Ally Nawrocki - Lucy / Rock Monster Girl
 * Jim Poole - Pirate at Jolly Joe's (Scooter Carrot)
 * Joe Spadford - Jacob Lewis / Additional Voices
 * Brian Roberts - Additional Voices
 * Andy Youssi - Additional Voices
 * John Wahba - Additional Voices
 * Patrick Kramer - Colin

Production
Phil Vischer completed the script for this film in 2002 (before Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl was released). But because of the bankruptcy and buyout of assets of Big Idea Productions, the film wasn't able to start production until late 2005.

The animation was done by Starz Animation in Canada in associates with Big Idea, Inc. in America.

Reception
According to the review aggregator website Rotten Tomatoes, 39% of critics have given the film a positive review based on 33 reviews, with an average rating of 4.69/10. The site's critics consensus reads, "This Veggietale should please the youngest crowds, but the silly script will tire the more discerning viewer." At Metacritic, the film has a weighted average score of 49 out of 100 based on 13 critics, indicating "mixed or average reviews". The film earned $12.7 million for Universal Studios out of an estimated $15 million budget. The film was released on DVD on October 14, 2008.

Songs

 * Spanish Gold, sung by veggies on stage
 * Jolly Joe's, sung by Jolly Joe pirates at Jolly Joe's
 * Yo Ho Hero, sung by Newsboys and Steve Taylor and the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything
 * Papa's Got a Gumball Nellie, sung by Elliot the Brave (score)
 * Walking Rocks, sung by Elliot the Brave (score)
 * Spanish Gold Reprise, sung by veggies on stage
 * The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, sung by Relient K when the credits are paused
 * Rock Monster, sung by the entire food cast while the credits are paused, is a parody of Rock Lobster by The B-52's
 * What We Gonna Do?, sung by TobyMac during the ending credits
 * The Right Thing, sung by Mandisa only on the soundtrack